| Archive for The official forum of the Royal Navy Volunteer Bands A home for the Royal Navy Volunteer Bands |
| MrJpig |
BASE GUITAR?In this day of multifunctional items I present.......
 
|
||
| sticky blue |
Is it an egg slicer as well ?? 
|
||
| MrJpig |
It will certainly slice something!!!! 
|
||
| Hornblower |
Fender bog? 
|
||
| RAB |
The Very First Seat-ar??? 
|
||
| lesbryan |
Or could it a SHITAR 
|
||
| General Melchett |
I'm glad a multi-functional use has come up for my pickled eggs...! | ||
| MrJpig |
It could be that Gutair we were looking for!!?? | ||
| Aaron Aardvark |
wahhhhhhh...Les....good one
:smt046 awwwww my head hurts..... 
|
||
| lesbryan |
Youl get some BUM notes on that 
|
||
| MrJpig |
The pick ups are manufactured by ELSAN | ||
| bootybandy |
That along with a Urinaphone will need another two instruments for a Chamber Quartet. | ||
| Co-admin |
Chamber Quartet? Have you gone potty
|
||
| RAB |
What about the heads Andy, are they standard or flush...?????
|
||
| sticky blue |
I suppose you wouldn't have to wet your fingners to skid down the strings to get higher notes and use a pluctrum when playing larger pieces 
|
||
| Co-admin |
He'd use a plrectum with it, still sound crap though | ||
| lesbryan |
We could add a LOO loophone that could be three? 
|
||
| Hornblower |
Uh? 
Is it me? Sorry Les, don't geddit...
|
||
| Aaron Aardvark |
Ok. Lets try and work it out.
Three? Loo.....ok it has a toilet theme....relevant. Loophone?.....still on a toilet theme...slightly relevant...but Phone?? mm not sure. LOO loophone??? ....loster than a lost person here. Any suggestions.?? We could add a LOO loophone that could be three?........????? Les...matey.....help me out here. Im starting to feel like I have missed some serious profound statement that could well be the funniest gag you have yet come up with and that would be a real shame if I missed it.
|
||
| Aaron Aardvark |
ahhhhhhhhhhh...light bulb on head. 
Urinaphone....loophone....chamber quartet?? Thats only three though Les. roflmao. |
||
| lesbryan |
Its ok just me been a bit far out
|
||
| FFoglamp |
Is that Loo far out, as in LOOFAH !!! | ||
| lesbryan |
Thats it loo far out
|
||
| Hornblower |
Splain yerself Les me ol' mucker, I, like Aa Aa believe there is something dead funny in there somewhere... Is it a lack of punctuation thing? |
||
| Hornblower |
Ooops! Too late - you just have, forget it... | ||
| Co-admin |
Surely you mean constipation. I knew a mathematician once who was constipated, clever bloke he was and worked it out with a pencil
|
||
| lesbryan |
All i can say is i was trying to put in context a phone as in saxaphone(loophone) but it dint work AHHHHHHH WELL 
|
||
| Aaron Aardvark |
ahhhh ...It did work Les.....I got there in the end. 
|
||
| Co-admin |
Loo phone as in Meloophone
|
||
| Hornblower |
Not me though - too fick me.... | ||
| Co-admin |
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Horn holders, can't live with them and can't shoot them (legaly  )
|
||
| lesbryan |
THANKS LADS I WAS ADITHERING THERE
|
||
| MrJpig |
How about a 'Sluiceaphone'? | ||
| sticky blue |
Would it be a mobile sluiceaphone or static ?? | ||
| RAB |
Pi$$ easy to play...but a sh** sound..... | ||
| bootybandy |
What was that thing Rolf Harris use to play on? Was that some kind of phone thingy!!! | ||
| bootybandy |
Got it.....
|
||
| Hornblower |
Here endeth the thread... | ||
| bootybandy |
Did you know Rolf Harris's dad came from Merthyr Tydfil? | ||
| Aaron Aardvark |
whoopy doooo!!! | ||
| bootybandy |
I'll take that as an affirmative then Double Aa. | ||
| Aaron Aardvark |
sorry....v.rude of me......very stressy tonight.
Ill start again... Wow! no I didn't know that Brian.....thankyou for that whizzy piece of really interesting info. 
|
||
| bootybandy |
My pleasure... | ||
| Co-admin |
Does that make Rolf a half Welsher?
All together now... bestiality's best boys, bestiality's best shag a sheep and a wallaby and a roo and an... Wrong continent Aaron you get away with it this time 
|
||
| RAB |
Tie me old black sheep down sport....  ...tie me old black sheep down...
|
||
| Aaron Aardvark |
:smt046 :smt046 :smt046 | ||
| Aaron Aardvark |
Im jake the pake diddle idddle iddle um...with my extra sheep diddle iddle iddle um | ||
| bootybandy |
Two little Jocks had two Tartan frocks, each wore a Tar-tan hat,
Gaily they played, each Summers day, Hatting was their trade..... |
||
| MrJpig |
CYMBAL CRASH NEW HEADING
What about the Scottish version of the Stones hit "Hey..... you.... get offa my cloud"??? HEY.... MACLEOD..... GET OFFA MA EWE!! 
(probably been said before sorry but now half way down a bottle of SAINT CLAIR) 0036 hrs still alone
|
||
| MrJpig |
Oh no I`m not Mr Lever is here ....HI THERE ... HELLO CAN YOU HERE ME???? | ||
| K.S.J.LEVER |
[QUOTE='andy wymer']Oh no I`m not Mr Lever is here ....HI THERE ... HELLO CAN YOU HERE ME????[/QUOTE]Recieving you LOUD & CLEAR Andy | ||
| MrJpig |
AAH A friend indeed.
Just realised the Macleod gag was used by RAB...Oh well he owes me a few anyway!!
|
||
| RAB |
:smt046 So Rolfy Baby was part Jock as well????.. .Wow....I'm impressed.... :smt026 
yes ANDY, that's one less IOU... |
||
| Len |
do i know Rolf Harris's dad came from Merthyr Tydfyll?
No, but hum the first couple of bars and I'll pick it up. |
||
| Hornblower |
hum hum humde hum humhum
hum huuuum hum hummmmm (take it away Len... )
|
||
| bootybandy |
That's the wrong tune Stuey. It should be; doo bee doo do be do be be be do Be bop de do a be bop de do |
||
| RAB |
Yes Len, you always had a good "busker's" ear.... ... It came in handy a few times at places like Culzean Castle...
|
||
| Hornblower |
look you look you look
butty butty look you isn't it look you. Who's hat is this pith helmet? (Look you) |
||
| bootybandy |
Oooohh, Old Taffy Thorn strikes again.
Would you like a bit more Welsh in you Stu???? Who's coats this jacket? Have you finished reading that newspaper you're sat on? Who's hat iz zat en? |
||
| MrJpig |
Don`t forget "Who`s house is that cottage"?
|
||
| MrJpig |
I was actually asked that once by a Welsh French Horn player at Northolt!!
|
||
| lesbryan |
Or pass me that empty bottle of pussers
|
||
| townsergeant |
Did you know that Ken Dodd's dad's dog's dead? 
Say it 6 times fast, after you've had few pints of Fuller's ESB! 
(Were they the same people who made Fuller's Earth?) Did you know that a friend of mine used to use Fuller's Earth on his hair instead of shampoo?......Try it sometime, when you want to get ashore in a hurry! 
|
||
| RAB |
Oi Townsergeant...as you're becoming "territorial" in your thread, have you checked the name of this one?????.... ...Oh I see ...you've recently taken up bass as the horn was a bit difficult for you????....Well well, how do you think WE became bass players???? 
|
||
| townsergeant |
We had to read bass-clef as a horn player/holder, so that is why I've entered in this thread!
Apart from that, I love Bass-players.....If I hadn't got kids of my own, I would have adopted a couple! 
|
||
| RAB |
Not a great idea Billy, unless you want "kids for life".... 
When's the last time you saw a "grown up" bass player???? :smt026 
|
||
| bootybandy |
Yes, a Bass player should be just for Christmas and not for Life...
(But only one Christmas mind you). :smt111 |
||
| Len |
you forgot See those four houses? Mine's the middle one. | ||
| bootybandy |
Or hold these two sheep while I count them.... | ||
| Baaaaaaaaaaass |
Is that not Andy Embury's bass guitar?
-insert witty comment here- |
||
| bootybandy |
It can't be Emburys, it's in tune..... |
||
| Baaaaaaaaaaass |
And he's not dragging his nails down the f@#$*Łg strings during a rehearsal, either. | ||
| Baaaaaaaaaaass |
http://www.jerzydrozdbasses.com/yvescarbonne.htm | ||