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RAB · Posted: Sun May 06, 2007 10:18 pm Post subject: ROUGHY TOUGHY RIFLE RMB'S

With DAN's permission (already granted), I have to Dit this story.....

FOSNI Band..circa '73/74.. Military Training.. Barry Buddon Camp, near Arbroath....

I'm sure I'm not committing any official secrets act offence (if I am bollox to the system as always)....

NATO Excercise..

OPERATION NORTHERN MERGER..

The idea was that the Dutch Marines (Long haired with their own trade union) were not up to scratch to operate with the highly trained ranks of the other NATO troops. In their wisdom, to award the necessary 'Brownie Points', they decided to present an 'easy victory' to them, by pitching them against FOSNI Band for a weekend exercise...

BIG MISTAKE

We got wind of this, and decided that if they can have long hair, we can have a break from GH's horrendous schedule of gigs, and earn our cap-badges..Yep.. Green Berets, Combat Gear...SLR..SMG...GPMG's the works....

Many things happened on the first night, including the 'Bulgers' creeping up on the Hairy Dope smokers (allegedly), and wiping out the entire Mob of wimps and pimps....Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah..(Not as intended)...

The MOD..NATO...Head Sheds, whatever, decided that was a bit unfair, as there were about 40 of us against 300 or so of them, so they decided we should do it all again next day in daylight, to give them a chance to see us coming...

They brought in low-flying lightinng jets (or whatever the noisy frightening fkr's were called at that time) to warn of our advances..(fuckin cheating b'stards), and they based all the white-arm-banded stewards with us on our adavance....

...(OI Bandy..You're dead)

We still had a great load of Guy Fawkes toys to play with, and despite the cries and whistles of the 'referees' sitting on our shoulders , we made a real mess of the Tulip Tip-toers Continental breakfast break, and to us it was 2-0..

Official Verdict..???

WE SAW YOU COMING SO

During the training, we had to do a 'night marksman's shoot' in total darkness within the range...
A tricky manouvre as there was a pit dug for

..Fecked if I know

, and the newly promoted Cpl. Bulger (DAN) was in charge of making sure nobody fell into the hazard....(Great job did Cpl.DAN do)...

Enter stage left, the very same Cpl. DAN, to show us how it's done, and SCREAMED into the hole....

GEORGE COAD (RIP) was the only guy sober and wise enough to realise DAN was in trouble, and duly hauled DAN up from the hole by the leg...

Oh yes guys.. We was properly trained to defend our Country...
Despite Lanimer days and Black Isle Shows......

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Pusser · Posted: Mon May 07, 2007 7:38 am Post subject:

RAB! There was another band employed during the same excercise. Ark Royal at sea. Rough as you would want for a good sea story with lumps lasting several days. The dit at the time was cross operating with the USS Independence (which ship made the Ark look like a dingy) a large number of US Navy pilots failed to land on the Ark, though I recall some fixed wings marked USMC which was nice! I gather 'our' pilots compared landing on their ship to Heathrow!
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Pusser!

RAB · Posted: Mon May 07, 2007 7:56 am Post subject:

PAT..I remember the Carriers lying off the coast of Carnoustie. In fact, my night patrol lay in awe at the size of the friggin' things as we did our Dad's Army shore protection. Some 34 years down the line, may I pass on my belated thanks to Ark Royal Band for their assistance in what has to be one of the greatest victories (although not written that way lol) in the history of The Royal Marines Band Service...

(stand by for a blackcat approaching from the stern)...

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townsergeant · Posted: Mon May 07, 2007 9:19 am Post subject:

Hey Rab, I hope you cleaned your .303 afterwards!

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Dan A · Posted: Mon May 07, 2007 11:28 am Post subject:

Here goes Rab... the definitive story of FOSNI Band versus the a battalion of Dutch Marines.. the Hermes, Albion and the Ark...picture the scene....numerous jet aircraft..which are providing the CAP for the dutch beach landings by helicopterand landing craft...at Barry Buddon...their objective and task...to hold a beachhead and set up an HQ to patrol the local area where known insurgents and general bad ar$e b'stards are hiding (FOSNI Band) bloody good description of the band at the time.

As a section cpl i was tasked with a recce of the beach landings,,, i watched while Charlie Laws wrote down what was out there...it looked like D Day......Jets were over flying and reporting our positions to patrols who were soon chasing us....ok got the picture? The band were bivvied up well camoed about three miles inland....i had to produce a route on bearings to lead a night raid on cloggies hq...this patrol was commanded by Dave Buchanan with most of the band...... i had up front with me...none other than.....TOM Gallagher...looking particularly warlike....well WW1 warlike...puttees up to knees ..flight deck beret, mexy moustache and very ill fitting you cant see me suit draped with lots of wet saggy equipment...which was full of fags!!! he also had the GPMG which was bending him double!!!

We set off in good order......with me navigating...and tom dripping...then for reasons still not known dave chose to go another direction without telling me and tom...we were not lost they were!!!!

Then along happens a large group of men all toting guns....ahh we have found them says tom..... not unless they all been on Dutch language course says I....Phuck says tom...!!! So i decided we would ambush them..the two of us...it was my first command i was not going to waste it... Tom started laughing...I took the GPMG and sent Tom to the flank...best place, when someone is taking the pi$$.....anyway we let rip out of the dark lots of thundies....long bursts of machine gun fire..smoke grenades...tom laughing firing his SLR......cloggies were running around like headless chickens......Cease Fire shouts an Umpire who turns out to be a major from 45... I gets up and he says bring out your patrol CPl good ambush you caught 20 men in it!!!!!.... So i shouts TOM... come here...out he trots dragging his gun... looking a liitle flushed with success...... where you chaps from the major asks and where are the rest of your men....err.... we are it i said Cpl Bugler Archer and Musn Gallagher...Fosni band..Im a bugler and hes a trombone player!!!!!.its err ...Toms first ambush sir not counting him ambushing the lads with his coffee boat book on payday!!!.... The guy whoops with laughter and translates to the cloggies.....who all started arguing about whos fault it was.... at that moment the remainder of the band hit the cloggie HQ and devastated it....2-0 indeed......
Tom and i wandered back and got our heads down our duty done.....I named him NIGHTHAWK after that wonderful night...LMAO.....
True true story chaps.....
CSGT Joe havenhand our PW was just delighted ...pity GCH was not there...but then DofMs never felt the need to do mil training in those days!!!!!

Gallagher and Archer...WE Own the Night....!!!!!!.....LMFAO Final result of exercise was...the Dutch failed to meet their objectives....FOSNI...Ferking Orrible Sneaky Nasty Insurgents!!!!!!
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Errol · Posted: Mon May 07, 2007 10:38 pm Post subject:

Good stories boys. Made me laugh.

We should call you the Arbroath Smokies.

Dan A · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 5:34 am Post subject:

well we are two faced b'stards with no guts Erroll!!!!!!!!!
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I do not suffer from stress but I am a carrier!!

Pusser · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 9:47 am Post subject:

Those former CINCNAVHOME Band members (circa 1980s) involved in ‘MilitaryTraining’ will recall, thanks to Norman Gibbs who excelled in emulating ‘The Scrounger’ – see The Great Escape Flt Lt Hendley/James Garner – we met our military obligations in style.

On one ‘deployment’ to Portland Range we rolled in as a complete mobile unit. Within a couple of hours we had set up and secured perimeters, tents, galley, heads, POL point, MT park, HQ, sent out a couple of patrols, rigged up Thomas the Tank Engine and got the boiler on for tea/coffee and cracked on with all the usual military stuff like sentry posts, OPs, GPMG sites, range cards, all good fun (not really.) It was a very busy couple of hours.

We had an exception to the normal Training Team rule in that the Sgt Major was a thoroughly nice chap (mainly thanks to advance diplomacy by BMstr Mike Howarth) and his cohorts adopted a teaching attitude rather than the usual Bandie Bashing crap we had previously come to love and enjoy. Nonetheless this Sgt Major was on a mission to find something wrong with the whole set up and focused his attention on the Band’s TQ (me) perching on my shoulder and firing off question after question, “TQ where is……? “Over there Sgt Major.” “TQ what are you going to do with…..?” “This, Sgt Major.” “TQ what time is scran?” “1800 Sgt Major, right after you’ve had your shower.” It went on, getting tiresome.

As luck would have it, just as he came marching up with another pointless-try-to-cock-it-all-up-question, we were paid an aerial visit by an inquisitive Seaking who’s pilot hovered alongside the cliff just above our camp to have a see. I held up a welcoming hand to the pilot, turned and ran to the Sgt Major and shouted in his ear, “Yes, I’ll deal with that later. Where do want our Seaking parked?” Just for a moment he felt the force and really did believe as he was stopped dead. The look on his face? Priceless.
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Pusser!

RAB · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 4:10 pm Post subject:

.Superb Pat...Only RMB's could hope for a Seaking to arrive right on cue to assist in a tricky situation.

Seeing you post again reminds me that it will be 40yrs on 5thSeptember this year since we arrived on the hallowed ground of Deal Railway Station, to a 'rapturous' welcome from Cpls. Smith, Currie & Co...

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Roads to a friend's house are never long...

admin · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 4:59 pm Post subject:

We DID have REAL helicopters to play with one Mili Trainig.
Imagine the face of an RAF Wing Commander Helicopter driver when he finds out his marshalls on the ground are all young bandies and you have the man. Did he look worried? You bet he did! Did he do as we told him? Yes... shocking I know, but he really did. We even deployed onto the exercise it them without breaking any at all! Nobody decapitated, nothing blown away.

Then there was the battle of Lydd or could have possibly been the battle of St Martin's Plain when we captured the enemy in the first few minutes of the war game... the Intelligence Corps Senior Command Course who were brewing up a wet in a wood by the camp as we drove past going into the exercise area. They didn't laugh at being caught by bandies but we did! Wahhhhh
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Errol · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 6:23 pm Post subject:

ZedHorn · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 8:03 pm Post subject: Re: ROUGHY TOUGHY RIFLE RMB'S

Errol · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 8:19 pm Post subject:

I remember when Pluto was a puppy Zed.

ZedHorn · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 8:47 pm Post subject:

I thought he was a planet... you mean he grew that big from a doggy???
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Errol · Posted: Tue May 08, 2007 8:57 pm Post subject:

Nice one.
I'm sure GH wrote about 'him' and others.
But by Jupiter I prefer Mars,even if he is always at war
with the world....the new one anyhow. lol.